Sometimes you come across a thing and it gives you an “aha!” moment. It could be something you read, heard, or even a random little thought that came to your mind that ended up giving you a whole new perspective in life.
I hope these few little thoughts will have that impact on you.
Relationships are not complicated. At least they are not as complicated as we sometimes make them be. If someone wants to be with us, they will be with us. They will make time, put in an effort, and do what’s needed to be done. And if they do not want to, there is nothing you could do to get them to put in the level of effort that goes into a relationship. It is as simple as that.
If you find yourself having to put so much effort into getting your romantic partner to put even the minimum effort into a relationship, it is time to let it go. Communicate your needs clearly, and if they are not being met, you should not waste your energy on them.
On Good Things and Good People
There is zero connection between a person’s inherent goodness and how their life turns out to be. Sometimes terrible things happen to good people and great things happen to bad people. If you believe that your life will be a seamless journey filled only with joy just because you are a good person, you will be up for a bitter surprise when you see that it is not how things work.
You can turn towards religion or some vague philosophy to try and understand why things are the way they are, but there is no absolute explanation to the way how anyone’s life the way it is. All you can do is try to make good decisions in life, working hard towards a life that you desire, and hoping for the best.
On Finding Happiness
You are the only one responsible for your own happiness. Nobody owes you joy. It is great if there are people in your life who love you and care about you enough to try, but you are the one who should always control your happiness meter.
In this dynamic world where everything can be impermanent, giving someone else control of your happiness can be terribly risky. If you build the foundation of your happiness around someone else, your entire world would crash down if you lose them in some way. Make others happy, and let them make you happy, too. But, always remember that you are the one with the control and responsibility to make yourself happy.
On Knowing Things
Nobody just “knows” things. Nobody has the ability to be completely certain about any of the major decisions that they make in their life—from selecting their college major to finding a partner. What we do have is our skills, experiences, and a little bit of intuition that we can use to make an informed decision.
When you think back about any point in your life, you probably took decisions that you felt right at the time. Therefore, do not look back and scold your 18-year-old-self for selecting the wrong major, now that you have more experiences and broader perspective things. Every decision has pros and cons. There is never a perfect way to do things.
On Good Intentions
Do not put too much weight into the “good intentions” that you have. I’m sure they feel good to you right now, but too many roads to failure and disaster have been paved by people having what they thought were good intentions. Simply meaning well does not justify any harm that you cause along the way with what you do or how you behave.
Say you hurt someone while doing something with good intentions. Your good intentions would not make their pain any less. It is perfectly fine to do things with good intentions, but do not think it would justify any chaos you may cause.
Manifestations, “the law of attraction“, “the secret” or whatever it is called, remember that the universe will not make things happen magically for you if you do not actively work towards achieving them. What the universe will actually do is reacting to what you do.
When you initiate things and passionately work towards things, the universe has a way of lining things up for you. Just sitting back somewhere comfortable and really really wanting something would not make them appear at your feet.
Have a goal, make a plan, and go at it with all your might. The universe will cheer you on then!